Power in Submission
Few things compare to the feeling I get when there is a powerful person kneeling at my feet. While it can be hot to play the "worthless sub" in the context of a scene it is not an acceptable personality trait or archetype to fall into. It is not enough for you to be kneeling, you must be an amazing and remarkable human being; Lay that at my feet.The power that I have as the domme is given to me by the submissive. When you empower yourself you are also empowering me. Self-love is the greatest act of service.
“Think of a sunflower, they bow to the sun. But if you see some that are bowed too far down, it means they're dead. You're here serving, you're not a servant....”
If you are leaving your BDSM experiences feeling weak or degraded (and not in a fun way), something is wrong. That is when what we do has the potential to become harmful regardless of it being consensual. It is your JOB as the submissive to use this beautiful thing we call BDSM to explore yourself and come out feeling better. This is the power of NO. As you are trusting me, I am also trusting you.You must tell me when something is wrong, regardless of whether you mistakenly think it will let me down or not. Like with rope bondage, I can use all the information that I have to avoid hurting you, but I, and every other rigger is relying on you to tell us when something bad is happening to you. You can't see nerve damage happening, only the bottom can feel it. You are in charge of protecting yourself emotionally, mentally, and physically.
As Rumi so wonderfully wrote "Let the beauty we love, be what we do. There are a hundred ways to kneel and kiss the ground". There are many ways to express submission and your power does not only come from the power of no, but also how you give your submission is how you empower your dominant.
"..Serving is the supreme art. God is the first of servants. God serves men, but he's not a servant to men."
The more forthcoming you can be about your desires the better you are equipping your dominant.The more you can support your dominant in their journey the more they can support you. This may ruin the fantasy for you but domination, in its own different way, is also an act of service, and I don't mean service topping. When we both meet eachother on this level we are both forcing each other to level up.